A google image of a dangerous wolf in sheep-skin.

Give #BroOchola A break for heaven’s sake!

Welcome to the era of information explosion where a WhatsApp screenshot of a wrong text, popping up in a wrong forum, makes several rounds within minutes. In just one hour, it becomes red hot gossip trending on Twitter, WhatsApp, Instagram and Facebook.

What makes an erotic message, mistakenly sent by a Christian brother, to his local prayer cell go insanely viral? We might ask.

It is definitely not because this brother, most likely, a respected and “God fearing” member within the ranks of his prayer cell, has done something extraordinary.

It is also not because of the romantically worded lines aimed at an undisclosed “jaber” that go like;
“you seem to love my voice……..this same voice will be whispering in your ear asking you how you feel when you will be having your orgasms in cloud nine.” (You can trust a brother from the lakeside to unleash powerful lyrics. Donge?)

However, the main reason why it goes viral, and spreads like bush fire during a dry season, is because this country is full of unforgiving hypocrites masquerading as faithfuls in places of worship.

This whole shit, about brother Ochola, doing the rounds on social media has something to do with a collective sense of guilt in, a country that prides itself to be over 80% Christian and yet only less than 10% practice its teachings effectively. Yes, I said less than 10% of all Kenyans. If we ca be more honest, the percentage of those practicing true Christianity in Kenya tends towards zero!

By bashing brother Ochola, it makes those doing so feel less bad about their own secret sins. What they subconsciously seek is an inexplicable satisfaction and consolation which comes with that aah! moment; “kumbe I am not alone!” Better still, guilty nonbelievers find a good reason to justify themselves by saying, “I told you! I am better off not going to church. All these church-goers are pretenders!”

Remember what Jesus said when they brought a woman accused of prostitution before Him? “If you think you are clean, be the first to cast a stone.” We are told that the angry mob evaporated into thin air, one by one, because none of them was clean!

Given that the poor woman was supposed to be stoned to death by fellow sinners, while her male partners in crime roamed the ancient streets  Scot-free! Just because they hadn’t been caught, is in itself a big paradox. Didn’t it stink of pure hypocrisy back then? The same is now evident in the brother Ocholla saga and many other similar cases.

Of course as a Christian, Ocholla allowed himself to slide too low. However, without looking like we want to defend lustful thoughts and promiscuity, just like any other human being, brother Ocholla might have found himself in a highly tempting situation. To be honest, we all do.
It might not be that you dangerously flirt with a beautiful “jaber” who happens to be in your cross-hairs; but it might be something as mundane as that occasional urge to tamper with the figures in your company account books, in order to fatten your personal bank account.
Yours might be discretely tampering with the online procurement systems and adding that zero to the amount you are supposed to receive from NYS, as total payment for your tender of supplying air and dust to them!

Sometimes it might even be a really terrible sin like deliberately emitting poisonous gases through your posterior in a packed matatu; a result of many mandondo helpings over lunchtime, and you leave everyone in that matatu gasping for breath; the poor folks arrive home in foul moods and the house girls have to bear the blunt, thanks to your bad behavior. You see? We are all sinners.

Unlike most of the smooth operators in church today, brother Ocholla was just  an unlucky dude (You know how these iPhones can behave at times). In the heat of the moment, the brother forgot that he had two open WhatsApp chat threads, and oops!
That is how his little romantic secret ended up on the wrong wall and out into the gossip-hungry world.

You could almost hear the poor chap scream, ouch! In utter pain, after hitting the send button, even as he quickly fumbled for a nonexistent “unsend” button on his expensive gadget. Surely this smartphones should have the “unsend” button. Don’t you think so? How many ladies do you think have mistakenly sent seriously erotic messages to their fathers-in-law in this world? When it happens, the first thing that comes into mind is a wish that the ground can open up and swallow you whole. Matters get complicated when your father-in-law goes ahead and calls back because he can’t understand the message!

Thank God brother Ocholla is not a Kenyan politician. If he was, even with the evidence plastered in a million walls across the country, our eyes and ears could be hurting by now from mere watching and listening to the politician try to explain the meaning of his famous WhatsApp text, in the most comical and foolish ways; which would leave no doubt that Kenyan politicians always think Kenyans have porridge or cotton for a brain!

If brother Ochola was a politician, he could hurriedly convene a press conference and, look straight into the cameras without butting an eyelid, then proceed to say that,

” I was misquoted! what I meant in that text is that, when Jesus comes, we will all be having holy organisms at the 9th heaven (cloud nine) because we are all brides of Jesus!”
We have recently heard a politician say that he said people will die of happiness in the next general elections! But we all know he said that, in order for his candidate to be president in 2017, a few people must die!
Haven’t we also been told, in some religions, that every saint will be entertained with his own 70 yellow yellow virgins once he arrives in heaven! especially if he travels expressly by blowing himself up for a “good’ cause?

It seems there are lots of erotic fantasies linked to religion and a politician might easily convince some people that #BroOcholla’s text was actually religious!

A politician, who has never been a writer in his life, may also face the cameras and say that those were draft notes he was preparing, for his upcoming romantic novel,which were mistakenly sent to his prayer cell’s WhatsApp group wall!

And you know what? His supporters would applaud him and call a prayer rally for the politician where they will shout, at the top of their voices, that political enemies are out to finish their man! The sycophants, who normally speak in hoarse voices due to constant shouting in defense of their bosses, will also say that their tribe has been targeted by certain political enemies!  Believe you me, a politician can get away with almost anything, in this country.

The brother Ocholla bashing going on Kenyan social media fueled by #KOT, has something to do with a country full of “holier than thou paragons of morality” lurking in the streets of social media, waiting to pounce on anybody who attracts their wrath and make minced meat out of him. These idle army of mercenaries are gossip-hungry and never dwell on one issue for too long. However, they know how to inflict the greatest damage with their hash tags (or is it harsh-tags?) within a very short time, before they move on to their next unlucky victim or hot topic of gossip.

Ever realized that whenever a thief is killed by an angry mob, in what is commonly called “mob justice” (If at all there is any “justice” in a mob), fellow thieves are the ones who finish off the poor fellow, probably for the fear of being exposed by him?
We are all behaving like the thieves in that marauding mob which is too quick to lynch a hapless fellow, then calls that “justice of the mob!” Of course there have been a number of voices of reason in #BroOcholla’s case and true Christians understandably shudder every time such a thing happens. The biggest question any Christian should ask in moments of dealing with a wayward brother is, “What would have Jesus done in the same circumstances?”

Just the same way we have many fellows in church today who are addicted to weird perversions such as masturbation, adultery and watching pornographic videos, Stories abound in the bible, of great men of God who fell so hard to temptations. Remember King David?

This king was at some point a pervert whose best pastime was watching naked women, while they took their bath in open topped bathrooms. This he did from his vantage point at the rooftops of his palace, where he used to go and shoot some breeze (#BikoZulu would quip).

A story is told of how he once watched Uriah’s wife taking a bath and he was totally awestruck. He was completely overcome by pure lust to an extent where he immediately hatched a conspiracy to murder the beautiful woman’s husband! Needless to say, if King David was mesmerized by this woman’s beauty, then she must have been quite something. A sight to behold!

Uriah, a soldier in David’s own army, could consequently be sent, on purpose, to the most dangerous war front line where he was easily killed by the enemy! (See that?). Men can do anything when hopelessly smitten with lust! This includes men of God.

It should be remembered that David was not just any other king. He was an anointed king of Israel! Did he commit a terrible sin? YES. Did God forgive him? YES. So who are we not to forgive brother Ochola? The fact that our own weaknesses have not been exposed doesn’t make us any better!

What if king David lived in the 21st century? I imagine one of his bodyguards could be a sneaky paparazzi would take a photo of the king standing on the rooftops, lustfully ogling at a naked woman (from a bird’s eye view) looking so horny and stupid; of course with a kingly bulge in his loincloth! It could have been an unholy sight.

The photo could have gone viral within minutes. Respectable media houses could be willing to pay two arms and a leg for the million dollar photo. Museums across the world would offer to pay millions of dollars to have the original photo.

Forgive my unending rumblings, but I am trying to pass a pertinent message to the Christian fraternity here. We sit in church with wolves dressed in sheepskin!

In so many words, I am trying to warn my fellow Christians that you don’t have to wait for a cold blooded scaly reptile to slither into your prayer cell for you to realize that Lucifer is never far from where you conduct your bible discussions and prayers. You don’t have to be on the lookout for a creature that is half human and half a goat, with bizarrely twisted horns to know that Satan is always nearby. Satan hates prayer cell because they disturb his kingdom.

Sometimes Lucifer walks into your prayer meetings on high heels, dressed in an expensive skirt suit, or in an Italian suit with a nicely pressed shirt and a matching tie!
I bet he also never misses to say hi in the most saintly voice, “Bwana asifiwe brother Ochola.” He is perhaps the most respected member of your prayer cell!

Unbeknownst to you, he is always on the lookout for the slightest opportunity to kick you out of this prayerful prayer cell, full of intercessors, and bring you down when you are completely on your own. What can you say about a brother or a sister who exposes a fellow Christian to the whole world in the most ruthless way like whoever took that screenshot in the Embakasi Prayer Cell WhatsApp group?

Aren’t we supposed to have each other’s back, always lifting up a fallen brother or sister when Satan leads him or her astray? Satan has succeeded in kicking brother Ochola out of church and most of us are still applauding in the hot gossip that ensued!

Tell me how Ochola can bring himself to face members of his prayer cell or his church or even his family! Tell me how he can ever trust a brother or sister in Christ ever again in his remaining days on earth! Yes his text was unchristian, but we have no authority to judge him and expose Christianity as a big joke to the whole world!

The person who posted that screenshot online is a worse pervert than the one who flirts with online strangers. He or she is the darkest agent of Lucifer in that prayer cell and we should be wary of such characters in church.

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